Seriously, I busted out laughing after reading this. Please keep in mind that this was about three weeks into my great Summer 2003 Cookie and Milkshake Fast.

They held me down and shoved thin mints in my face

But I will never give in

They took me to Culvers, I watched them eat custard

But I will never give in

He told me about his homemade chocolate chip cookies

But I will never give in

.

No no no no, I will never give in

I’ll drop those pounds faster than last year’s pay

I spent that on food anyway!

You people with your carbohydrates and calories from fat have no power over me!

You can tempt me with your mouth-watering ooey-gooey goodness

But I will never ever give in

.

Our motto might be “eat it anyway!” and so far that’s been true

But if I give in anymore, I’ll be feelin’ blue

‘Cause I know that if I eat those cookies and sip up that milkshake

I’ll be feeling it in my thighs, back and ass for years to come

And I don’t mean to be crass, but I’m toning that bum!

.

So give me your worst people, I can take it   In any shape or form you’ve got

As long as first you don’t bake it in an oven that’s toasty hot

Because I’ll eat it faster than a homeless man in a pie eating contest

And that’s not funny so quit your laughing buddy!

Posted 6/11/2003 at 11:29 PM